The Flame’s very own love consultants are back!! Well half of them anyways…after a lengthy hiatus for reasons not disclosed with our readers, Alpha of Alpha and Omega is back with an interview with secret UNIS student who shares her story of romance and struggle.

————————————-

Alpha: Um, how do I start this? Hi? 

X: Yeah this is more awkward that I thought it would be…

A: Please, I am just the same, don’t think of this as a consulting session but more of an advice from friend

X: That’s very helpful

A: Was that sarcasm?

X: Yes

Alpha: …….

X: Okay lets move on shall we

A: Sure, but first things first, I have to give you a pseudonym for the article, is there any particular name you like?

X: I don’t know, if I choose the name, I am afraid it might reveal my identity *inhales sharply

A: Okay…… how about “Sally”

Sally: Why Sally, that’s so random. Why not like Susan or Peter or Michael or….Sherlock

A: Sally just occurred to me, and from what you listed just now, Susan was the only girl’s name

S: SHERLOCK IS A GIRL’S NAME

A: GOOD, I WAS TESTING YOU, WELCOME TO THE FANDOM  (high-fives) Alright let’s get to business; I just wanted to ask you, why you chose to do an interview instead of a usual submission?

S: Well I have several reasons: first, I thought my story wasn’t so suitable for the usual submission system because I had too many questions regarding my story, and second, I was so bored and didn’t want to stay home, and this was my excuse to get out of the house.

A: Really? how?

S: Okay, you see, moms won’t really let you out if you are “just” going outside. But when you tell them you are going out for “an interview for the school newspaper,” they are much more lenient.

A: This is defaming our newspaper…

S: Like I care

A: OH you heard that guys?

S: oh  ——-

A: Oh no you didn’t

S: Oh god, please censor that

A: Censor your attitude first

S: (silently sits in shame)

A: Okayyy, lets start our “advice session”…

S: Hey I didn’t finish my third reason, it’s because you owe me lunch ——–

A: please don’t say my actual name, it being recorded

S: —–, ——, —–, ——

A: How old are you?

S: Nice try. If you cant reveal your identity I can’t reveal mine.

A:…… so Sally, tell us your story.

S: Okay: so there is this guy I met last summer at an academy, he is one year older than me and I developed some feelings for him because he was so nice to me.

A: And you’ve been in contacting him ever since?

S: Yes, but mostly he spends time helping me with things like homework or assignments when I am having trouble with school work 

A: Oh, like those distant tutors through Skype?

S: Exactly. But my concern is that he recently became really harsh on me, now when he chats with me, he doesn’t like it when I derail from academics.

A: Ouch, that does sound harsh

S: He used to be really really nice and caring but now he tells me to focus on my studies so often. It’s so frustrating.

A: I see. Well, could it be that he became a little harsh on you for the sake of your own good?

S: I thought that too, but…

A: But if you didn’t feel any of care or comfort from his “harsh-advice,” you figured it was just harshness right?

S: Yeah….

A: But I think I can’t really judge it by looking for “hint of care from harshness” since everyone hides/reveals their true feelings to a different degree

S: Would you like to see the chat history? 

A: Well if you are comfortable with it I suppose? 

(read through the chat together)

S: This was yesterday

A: Wow that is actually pretty rough…

S: I know. And this one was from a week ago

A: What?! What’s up with this guys? But you know, after reading the one from a week ago and re-reading the one from yesterday I felt…

S: Felt what??

A: His…sincerity? would be the right word I guess

S: Really?

A: Yeah, like I can sort of feel that he really cares for you

S: Are you sure?

A: Well, I have actually done something similar to my friend before as well. So I can really empathize with this and… 

S: And?

A: That level of harshness? I think that’s coming from a genuine care, at least in my opinion and to be honest

S: Are you sure…?

A: Despite the gender, why would anyone even bother to do such thing if they had absolutely no feelings for you. And I don’t know whether he is only doing this to you or..

S: I asked another guy that is in a grade below him at the same school and he said there haven’t been any significant changes in his personality

A: Well that’s good. That means you are special, it could be in a good or a bad way, but you are different to him that’s for sure.

S: Yeah, but what if it’s a “bad” special

A: Alright, I can’t tell you for sure that it is something good

S: But why don’t I feel special in a more positive way? Why can’t he be nice to me like he does to other, why is he so mean to me

A: Calm down, you are not seeing this straight, okay listen. The more I try to think of his actions from his perspective, this is how I see it; him acting like this towards you is very special, and this time I mean a positive special sign.

S: How do you know that?

A: Let me tell you something first, just because someone never says  “I love you” doesn’t mean that person doesn’t love you; sometimes, there are words that show stronger love and care, like “have you eaten”, “wear some more layers”, “get to bed early”. Sometimes the words that merely seem like nitpick are just different ways of saying “I care for you” or “I love you”. And in my opinion, I really think he genuinely cares for you.

S: Being my mom means he care for me like…. a lot?

A: Not exactly, but I pretty sure some of your friends nitpick sometimes as well

S: Yeah so that’s weird, it doesn’t make sense, how do I distinguish that

A: (laughs) I see the flaw in my point, but I think it’s pretty easy to distinguish

S: HOW?

A: Choice of words

S: That’s so broad, example?

A: In a case like this, I think, in my very personal opinion, he would never ever call you “pathetic” if he was doing it out of care.

S: But….. I think he said that to me once

A: Really? show me

(Reads chat) 

S: Oops nevermind he said “disappointing”

A: For the readers – it was sent in two separate messages, “you are really” and “disappointing” sent with a minute of interval.

S: What? Why is that important

A: Ok,  think of this as an SAT Sentence Completion question

S: Ew what?

A: The sentence is “(something very negative), you are really (blank)” and you have narrowed the answer choices down to two, “disappointing” and “pathetic”. what would be a more suitable choice.

S: That is a very disturbing analogy, but since you emphasized “very negative”, pathetic would be right

A: But did he say pathetic? Nooo

S: Your point is?

A: I am saying, he probably took time to choose that word instead of something else. And I know this because he sent “you are really” at 6:54 and “disappointing” at 6:57, that must have been a deep deep self-contemplation.  It was sort of a wild guess, but that is the best case scenario

S: I sure hope so

A: Have you tried asking him directly? Or at least indirectly?

S: Yes

A: Then why did we even meet??

S: I don’t know how to say this…

A: What?

S: It wasn’t a “no” but it wasn’t a “yes” either

A: What do you mean?

S: It was somewhere in between.

A: No no no, guys are simple – it’s either 0 or 1

S: But 0.5 rounds up to 1

A: We round down. It’s over. 

S: What if he is approaching 1 and just need more time!?

A: That’s unlikely

S: I refuse to believe that

A: (sighs) Okay, what did he say?

S: Well, I told him about my feelings one day and he was sort of dumbfounded. then he told me that he felt the same but kept it to himself because he can’t really see ourselves in the long run because we are so distant and it would be hard to see each other until we both go to university in Korea.

A: Oh wow, okay take back what I said just now, this is a 1.  

S: BUT BUT

A: I think our session is over, the only question I have for you is, can YOU handle long distance?  I don’t need an answer now, just go home and think about him. and when you have an answer, confront him seriously. It might not work out, he still might not want to start this. But it’s worth a try.

—————————————————————————————–

The interview was done on July 17th and a few weeks ago I heard from “Sally” that they are now dating! They decided to do long distance relationship, so I sent Sally my article on that and she seems to like it!

Oh and please don’t forget to submit your own story here!